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This blog will contain some insight for those who have experienced spiritual abuse and will also hopefully help to educate those who would like to learn about it.
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A False Sense of Security

Posted January 16th, 2012 at 07:52 AM by Lois
There is a false sense of safety in never questioning or looking into what a church is teaching. The boat isn't rocked, everyone feels familiar and you know what to expect, even if you are unhappy. Yet if it is error being taught, then that nice sense of security is false. It means there really is no security.

That's really something to think about. You might liken it to some investment schemes. People have lost their life savings, or a good portion of it, by having a false sense of security in the investment plan offered by the scam artist. They truly believe their money is being wisely invested, with a guarantee of a profitable return. In the end, their security is shattered because what they placed their faith in ended up being false.

Some time ago, I read a book by Don C. Marler, former UPC member, entitled "Imprisoned in the Brotherhood." While I disagree with aspects of the book, he brought up some points worthy of consideration. In the introduction he shares about the pursuit of truth and how it can feel like the person is on shaky ground when they start this journey. Many people who are involved in unhealthy churches get caught up in religion instead of a relationship with God. When one starts to question if what their church teaches is true or not, it shakes this religious foundation and it can be quite scary. Let me quote from Don's introduction.

Quote:
"When one moves full tilt into pursuit of truth, he may find that the ground becomes shaky and his resolve to pursue truth wherever she might lead becomes tenuous. One learns that security based upon ignorance, prejudice, illusions, misinformation and blind tradition is a false security indeed. Old guideposts can no longer be relied upon. The prospect of seeking truth and following it fully then is often frightening. Not everyone can face it; some decide to keep their heads in the sand. The illusion of security is more tempting than the fearful journey into the unknown.

"Some individuals believe that pursuing truth wherever she leads is dangerous because it destroys or weakens belief and faith. Beliefs should be open to change and one would hope that truth should prevail over mere beliefs. Faith, of course, is different from beliefs and should be strengthened by truth. Does it not require faith to seek truth?

"A prerequisite for pursuing truth is the ability to be open and honest with self and the ability to recognize and accept that one doesn't possess all truth. Another is the ability and courage to assume individual responsibility for one's search and for the conclusion one reaches. The alternative to individual interpretation and definition of truth is an institutional definition and interpretation." End Quote

Why does the ground feel shaky when we start to question some teachings in unhealthy churches, whatever they may
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Where Is Our Focus?

Posted January 15th, 2012 at 07:20 AM by Lois
We often speak of the difference between following religion and having a relationship with God. Many of us, while in the UPC or similar churches, ended up getting caught up in religion.

Below is a quote from an article written in The Reporter News (a local weekly paper near the Houston area) on March 15, 2006. A minister by the name of Casey Jones is the author.

Quote:
"...if I had tried to convince some*one to become a Christian, it would have been a matter of my trying to get them to agree with me, rather than wishing for them to meet and experience God."

The above quote says a lot. Think about it for a bit. How many focus on getting people to their church or at least their organization? How many focus on getting the person into the baptismal tank or to have them speak in tongues?

Compare these things with wanting the person to meet and have a one on one personal relationship with God. See the huge difference? See the different focus and see how the focus may well be an indicator of the person's own relationship with God or perhaps the lack thereof?

I well remember when people from my former UPC church would go out door knocking. In fact, I was in charge of it for a time. It was to get people to come to our church. It was to get a Bible study started that taught our particular teachings and show them that their church was not saving anyone if they were attending another church. If someone had been prompted to attend some other church after our visit, we would have seen that as a failure. It really was about US and what WE had and indoctrinating them into our beliefs that were separate from most of the Christian world.

Some other Christians could go door knocking or send out invitations to their church, but would have been happy if, as a result of their efforts, someone went to another church in the area. While they would have welcomed the person at their church, it wasn't just about filling up their pews or hurrying up to drag them to their water baptism.

Can you see the difference?

This brings another thought to mind, and that is how some are in such a hurry to drag people into the baptismal tank and get them to speak in tongues. They will gather around and stay with the new people until both happen and then move on to focus on the next 'unsaved' believer. It is about getting two acts completed so a person is 'saved' and often there is little focus on helping them develop a one on one relationship with God.

Something to think about....
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Posted in Experiences
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Have You Spoken Out About Spiritual Abuse?

Posted January 14th, 2012 at 06:16 AM by Lois
I have had people share with me over the years that at first they didn't realize that they had experienced what has been termed as spiritual abuse. It wasn't until they came across a site such as spiritualabuse.org that they started to see parts of their experience as actual abuse.

Others are very reluctant, some even very adamant against, to state they had been abused in this manner because of the 'victim' status and they don't want to be portrayed or seen as a victim.

Call it what you want, the wrong does happen and affects many, many people worldwide. How deeply it effects somneone varies from person to person.

Some who have experienced this abuse have spoken out about it in various ways. Some, such as myself, started web sites. Some blog about it. Some write thesis papers on it. Some have online or in person support groups. Some make themselves available for people locally.

Have you spoken out about spiritual abuse/unhealthy churches or ministers in some form & if so, how have you done it?
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Posted in Leaving
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Locks of Love

Posted January 13th, 2012 at 09:14 AM by Lois
There may be some out there, who have left a church that teaches women are never to cut their hair, and who are thinking of getting their hair cut as they no longer believe the doctrine. You may want to consider donating your cut hair to Locks of Love, an organization that makes hairpieces for children. This link takes you to their hair donation page. You will need to read it for what they can accept.

http://www.locksoflove.org/donate.html
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Posted in Leaving, Standards
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UPC Manual #4

Posted January 12th, 2012 at 08:27 AM by Lois
Continuing on the requirements for licensing in the United Pentecostal Church. Below are the specific requirements for each of the three levels:

Section 3. Local License.

1. All applicants must be seventeen (17) years of age or over.

2. All applicants must have preached an average of one (1) sermon each week for a period of six (6) months or more before being examined by the District Board in relation to their call to the ministry. Exceptions to this requirement would be left to the discretion of the District Board. (It is understood that teaching a Sunday school class or leading services does not meet this requirement.)

3. All local licensed ministers are to labor in full cooperation with, and under the supervision of, their local United Pentecostal Church pastor until they enter into ministerial responsibilities severing them from their local assembly.

Section 4. General License.

1. All applicants must be nineteen (19) years of age or over.

2. All applicants must be presently engaged in the ministry as pastor, full-time evangelist, assistant pastor, elected or appointed official, full-time Bible school administrator, or instructor, except those qualifying under Paragraph 3.

3. Theological students (majoring in religion) who complete three (3) years of Bible training in any Bible college endorsed by the United Pentecostal Church International, and who otherwise qualify, may be granted either a Local or General License at the discretion of the District Board of the district in which they establish their legal residence. These students shall request their respective colleges to send the Bible College Report form to the District Superintendent. In no event shall the students be granted a license from the district in which the Bible college is located unless they are actively engaged in the ministry in that district prior to and at the time of licensing.

4. All applicants who are not Bible college graduates must have held Local License for at least one (1) year. They must also have proven their ministry for a period of one (1) year or more. During said time, applicants must have preached an average of one (1) sermon each week. (It is understood that teaching a Sunday school class or leading services does not meet this requirement.) Exceptions may be made for applicants who are being accepted from another church organization. (See Section 5, Paragraph 4.)

Section 5. Certificate of Ordination.

1. All applicants must be twenty-one (21) years of age or over and must have held General License for at least two (2) years. Any exception to this would be left to the discretion of the District Board.

2. All applicants must have proven their ministry for two (2) consecutive years and must presently be an active pastor, full-time evangelist, assistant pastor,
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Posted in Questioning
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