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Exorcism

Posted April 26th, 2010 at 06:30 PM by hillbillygirl
There was one side affect to being "possessed" that I liked. When my Mom was addressing me (and not the demon) she was more kind than she'd been in a long time. Also, she paid more attention to me than she had in a long time. Watching over me took priority over her best friend's daughter for the first time since they came into our lives. Of course, she was watching me and spending time with me to "make sure the demon in me didn't hurt anyone", but it was still nice to have my Mother back. Because of this, I started lying. They would ask me if the demon was speaking to me or if I was feeling rage, confusion, etc. and I lied and said yes because I wanted to keep receiving attention from my Mom and preference over the her friend's daughter. As I kept saying yes to everything they asked me about what was going on with me, they decided they were going to have to cast it out as soon as possible. I don't remember what the reason was for ever waiting.

So one weekend we go to Mom's best friend's house for the specific purpose of getting the demon cast out of me. My parents, Mom's best friend and her husband, and their teenage daughter all participated. Their son wasn't considered "spiritually stable" enough to help since the demon in me had come from him. They took me into a back room of their house, the farthest away from neighbors. They said that we might get loud and they didn't want anyone calling the cops thinking that someone was getting hurt.

When we got in the room, they put me in the middle of the floor and gathered around in a circle. I can't remember a lot of what was said, but there was a lot more describing of what the demon looked like, what it was "saying" to them about me, etc. At one point, they made me lay down and they each took an arm and a leg and held it tight to the floor. They said that if the demon got mad, it might give me extra strength. Sometimes I pushed my arms and legs against them to see if I did have super-human strength, but I was never stronger than my 9 year old self. Ha.

This went on for hours, my Dad got disgusted pretty quick and left the room. He was still pretty emotionally disturbed over his brother dying recently (which I wrote about here http://www.spiritualabuse.org/suppor...blog.php?b=122 ) and didn't like what he was seeing them do to me. They also had just asked me if I'd had thoughts of suicide, and like I had been doing lately, I answered yes even though it wasn't true. There was a lot of screaming at the demon to come out, and sometimes all the people holding me down and yelling in my face these awful descriptions got so scary that I screamed. They then said that "it was close", so I started screaming more to try and bring this awful episode to an end. I don't remember what was the deciding factor, but eventually someone yelled "It's out!!!" and then my Mom grabbed me and hugged me.

I was so happy, I thought that I wouldn't be scared at night anymore in my bedroom. I thought the demon talk and visions would be over. Unfortunately, I was wrong.
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There was one side affect to being "possessed" that I liked … my Mom was … more kind than she'd been in a long time. Also, she paid more attention to me than she had in a long time. Watching over me took priority … for the first time…
*Sigh* So sorry to hear this. From what I’ve gathered from several of your regular posts, blog posts, and your signature, you’ve been through so much at the hands of others. I wonder if those people who accused/spoke against you feared your independent thinking then came up with explanations about your "wrongdoing" to assuage their fears. Independent thinking is always a threat to dogmatic beliefs.
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Because of this, I started lying. They would ask me if the demon was speaking to me or if I was feeling rage, confusion, etc. and I lied and said yes because I wanted to keep receiving attention from my Mom…
Heartbreaking. I can guess that if they figured out you were lying, they’d only want to see it as a sin rather than as way of self-preservation. I think it’s normal for any of us to desire the positive attention of our mothers. I can see how one would try anything to have that attention when it wasn’t habitually given in the past.
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So one weekend we go to Mom's best friend's house for the specific purpose of getting the demon cast out of me. My parents, Mom's best friend and her husband, and their teenage daughter all participated. Their son wasn't considered "spiritually stable" enough to help since the demon in me had come from him. They took me into a back room of their house, the farthest away from neighbors. They said that we might get loud and they didn't want anyone calling the cops thinking that someone was getting hurt.
Little did they know, or care perhaps, that you were getting spiritually and emotionally hurt!
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…said that if the demon got mad, it might give me extra strength. Sometimes I pushed my arms and legs against them to see if I did have super-human strength, but I was never stronger than my 9 year old self. Ha.
*Sigh* Sounds as if they were on a more modern witch hunt. Of course, these days, they wouldn’t have thrown you in water with weights to see if you’d float. Nope—they’d be in prison and wouldn’t be free to be on call to meet other pressing needs for exorcisms elsewhere!
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This went on for hours … There was a lot of screaming at the demon to come out, and sometimes all the people holding me down and yelling in my face … I don't remember what was the deciding factor, but eventually someone yelled "It's out!!!"
If possessions really existed, I’d say they were the ones who needed the exorcism!
Posted February 1st, 2013 at 01:09 PM by jema jema is offline
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